Isolated in the ‘Burbs

I moved to the suburbs of Chicago in 2001. I had always dreamed about that house in a quiet area, close to schools, and where everyone drove. I was excited about moving out of the chaos, the noise, and the fears of the big city.

I grew up in Chicago’s neighborhood of Humboldt Park. It had its dangers, but I lived in an area in which all my aunts and uncles owned the buildings in a half block radius, so I always felt safe and it always felt like home. When we grew up and started moving away is when we really noticed the dangers of gang violence and crimes around us.

I was 16 when I left Humboldt Park to go live in a similar neighborhood, but in the back of my mind I always knew what I wanted – a sense of community and belonging. Although I never wanted the white picket fence or the 2.5 garage, I just wanted a place I could raise my son surrounded by positive influences and safety, a place where I could plant some roots and feel like I belonged.

But to all fairy stories there are also some drawbacks. Although I love my home, when I moved to that suburban neighborhood, there were things I definitely missed from the city. I missed walking in the neighborhood and visiting quaint shops and buying the unique products they sold. I missed seeing and talking to the diverse types of people who made up the community of Humboldt Park. I missed having ethnic and cultural influences around me. I missed not having family close by enough to walk over and talk about anything that day would bring. I also did not like that everything from stores to restaurants closed a lot earlier in the suburbs – I didn’t like that I couldn’t get a decent meal past 9 or 10 p.m. or that parties ended so early, when in Chicago, things always got started late.

Everything is quiet and still at night in the suburbs, so I missed the noise of cars, people, and music playing. I missed the unique restaurants from the different neighborhoods, the festivals during the summer, and the spontaneity of everything that is Chicago, because now planning a trip just to get a taco in Chicago would turn into an event.

I don’t miss shoveling snow to reserve a parking space on the street after a winter storm. I don’t miss parallel parking or finding a spot two blocks away from home. I don’t miss walking and feeling like I was being “watched.” I don’t miss being mugged, or yelled at by strangers on the street. I don’t miss the panhandlers, the long lines in the stores, or driving two hours to go around the block. I don’t miss the commuting on buses and trains. I don’t miss apartment living or the close proximity of noisy neighbors above or below. I don’t miss all those things that made me want to live in a house in the suburbs.

So I embrace the quiet sounds of suburban living, but I know I will always have that connection to Chicago, it’s where I was born and raised. So from time to time, I love taking that drive to my aunts’ or cousins’ houses. I love driving on Division Street or Pulaski Road. I don’t mind the occasional drive on 18th or 26th Streets or visits to downtown Chicago and I don’t take it for granted anymore. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder and I truly do love Chicago, but I prefer the peace that my suburban living has brought me.

~A